PODCAST DISCLAIMER

I don’t know why I hate fake ass shit.

Like, despise it…

I think it started when the apparent family issues that were present as a child couldn’t be talked about.

And not only could they not be talked about, but they were actively ignored until they built and built and built and exploded into full blown screaming matches and just…not healthy things.

I was told when I didn’t want to talk to a family member to do it “for the sake of holidays” or “for the sake of a dinner.” This lasted years and years and years.

And still a lot of the problems that were present are still there, but they are no longer any of my business or my problem. I have moved on. I have found peace.

But I constantly stifled my beliefs, my feelings, my thoughts…and put on a happy little smile and did as was asked because that’s what was expected, and what I thought was a form of respect.

And I really can’t stand that.

When I became an adult who learned how to regulate my emotions, I also learned that it’s not healthy to continuously bottle things up inside.

It’s not healthy to continuously push things to the side because of the fear of discomfort, when discomfort makes you grow…

And obviously there’s a time and place for everything…but oftentimes, those time and places get pushed and pushed and pushed until they never happen at all and then it’s the same exact thing as just hiding or stifling it.

So, I created my podcast.

My podcast was my outlet to work through the thoughts that I wanted to work through, to talk about things that make other people uncomfy, and to talk with others about things that make me giggle or interest me. I wanted to discuss situations and have conversations with people that inspire me. I wanted to learn and research things in a more in depth way. I wanted to grow.

Except, I have never received so much fucking hate from family and friends.
Only a few, but still…that’s a lot in my world.

Just recently I was talking to someone I consider family, and she told me “You surprise me in everything you do, and it is amazing, but you can shut down the podcast. Just let it die out. I listened to part of one of the conspiracy episodes, and I just can’t. We will forever agree to disagree.”

And I realized that every single person who had something negative to say only brought up the minuscule amount of episodes I do in relation to deep diving “conspiracies.”

Every other episode received praise.

And I just think it’s funny.

One of my childhood friends and I stopped being friends partly due to the fact that apparently me doing these episodes proved I had “changed,” and had suggested I was a Trump supporter (spoiler alert: I’m not). This is despite the fact that I’ve been researching these things since childhood, and that the same systems I was discussing neglected us both.

This got me thinking, though…

The episodes some don’t enjoy are just there, to listen to or not…the information provided is as reliable as I could possibly make it…and I don’t even go down too deep inside the rabbit holes. In fact, in regards to the information I intake it’s all quite moderate and surface level in comparison to what it could be. I skim the surface of ‘conspiracy’ and honestly keep everything as factual as possible. I could really go crazy if I wanted to, but I don’t. I just want to research things that I find interesting or sus.

Just like some episodes might be about motherhood, which isn’t for everybody.

Just like some episodes might be about drugs.

Or systems that make me upset.

Instagram blocking my podcast account just for making these episodes sucked too, but aye, I guess it is what it is.

And even though I don’t really care to get huge and famous and be some big influencer, I do want people who find interest in this stuff to be reached so we can communicate — whether they agree or not. I like discourse. I like discussions. And it seemed like discourse was okay as long as it stayed away from the history of our government, wars, our education system, our food, etc.

But I think it’s because of the spiritual awakening that’s currently occurring. I think it’s because we have been programmed not to question, that nothing matters, that we can do nothing. We just have to accept it, or completely uprise. That’s what they want you to believe. There is no middle ground, despite the truth often lying in the middle ground. Which is why I think it’s been hidden so well.

All I’m saying is hey, maybe, just maybe, the answer is to be aware. To wake up to what’s happening, so we can make better choices for ourselves.

I am willing to discuss with you whatever you believe in comparison to what I believe. I do not judge you based on your political affiliation. I will not judge you on anything other than your intention.

So I have decided that I’m still going to do it. Discuss the hard things.

I am going to talk about the things I want to talk about, and if I end up being wrong or misguided eventually then that is okay. I am human. And I am going to grow and learn. This is my path to take. Not yours.

And I’m still going to have so many other episodes too, that can’t possibly be seen as controversial unless you’re…okay, it probably can somehow, but fuck you. Overall my show is about so many things.

The Mirrored Universe.

It’s like my own dinner table, except everybody is invited.

And instead of food, we’re ingesting conversation and growth.

I am no longer going to go into these episodes with fear, or hesitant to speak because of what a few people feel weird about.

If that upsets you for some reason, you can kindly fuck off.
Let live, bitches. Let live.